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digitalmars.D - [OT] The Ten Commandments for C Programmers

reply pragma <pragma_member pathlink.com> writes:
Found this over on digg.com, and I thought it'd be worth while to share here.

http://www.lysator.liu.se/c/ten-commandments.html

The annotations are funny, but truthful.

"A null pointer points to regions filled with dragons, demons, core dumps, and
numberless other foul creatures, all of which delight in frolicing in thy
program if thou disturb their sleep."

- EricAnderton at yahoo
Jan 06 2006
next sibling parent reply "Kris" <fu bar.com> writes:
Nice!

A variation on the theme might be Dante's (Commedia) Inferno, and all the 
sins borne therein? Malebolge (circle 8) would be a prime candidate for a 
raft of programming sins <g>
Circle One - Those in limbo
Circle Two - The lustful
Circle Three - The gluttonous
Circle Four - The hoarders
Circle Five - The wrathful
Circle Six - The heretics
Circle Seven - The violent
Ring 1. Murderers, robbers, and plunderers
Ring 2. Suicides and those harmful to the world
Ring 3. Those harmful against God, nature, and art, as well as usurers
Circle Eight - The Fraudulent
Bowge (Trench) I. Panderers and Seducers
Bowge II. Flatterers
Bowge III. Simoniacs
Bowge IV. Sorcerers
Bowge V. Barrators
Bowge VI. Hypocrites
Bowge VII. Thieves
Bowge VIII. Counselors
Bowge IX. Sowers of Discord
Bowge X. Falsifiers
Circle Nine - Traitors
Region i: Traitors to their kindred
Region ii: Traitors to their country
Region iii: Traitors to their guests
Region iv: Traitors to their lords

Anyone up for having a go at these?




"pragma" <pragma_member pathlink.com> wrote in message 
news:dpmq0o$1rud$1 digitaldaemon.com...
 Found this over on digg.com, and I thought it'd be worth while to share 
 here.

 http://www.lysator.liu.se/c/ten-commandments.html

 The annotations are funny, but truthful.

 "A null pointer points to regions filled with dragons, demons, core dumps, 
 and
 numberless other foul creatures, all of which delight in frolicing in thy
 program if thou disturb their sleep."

 - EricAnderton at yahoo 

Jan 06 2006
next sibling parent "Jarrett Billingsley" <kb3ctd2 yahoo.com> writes:
"Kris" <fu bar.com> wrote in message news:dpmqhr$1snc$1 digitaldaemon.com...
 Circle One - Those in limbo

The guys who are tired of crappy languages like C++, but are still wary of VM-based languages like .Net and Java (i.e. D users)
 Circle Three - The gluttonous

Java
Jan 06 2006
prev sibling next sibling parent reply pragma <pragma_member pathlink.com> writes:
In article <dpmqhr$1snc$1 digitaldaemon.com>, Kris says...

Okay, I'll bite. Remember, its all in good fun. ;)
Circle One - Those in limbo

Those who fail to heed the rules of multithreaded programming, are doomed to deadlock for eternity.
Circle Two - The lustful

Asm programmers are simply in love with performance, and little else. ;)
Circle Three - The gluttonous

This one's full of web-developers for some reason - Java web applet programmers. - Php programmers - the API is so sprawling that it takes *two* web browsers to code with it. - Macromedia for making ColdFusion worse than it was... Lets take a not-quite-XML tag-based language (with embedded HTML, CSS and ECMA-script), with its own crippled ECMA-script-like language, run it through a Java-based compiler that emits side-effect prone Java code, to be compiled *again* into Java bytecode that then runs on a VM to serve a webpage, then reccomend that it be run on the crippled and crash-prone JRun webserver. Its resource cost can be calculated in Megawatt-hours per sacrificed chickens, just for a single developer workstation. (Not that I've used it or anything)
Circle Four - The hoarders

- Lisp programmers [are hogging all the parentheses]. - Anyone who doesn't close their file handles responsibly.
Circle Five - The wrathful

Virus writers.
Circle Six - The heretics

- VB Programmers *and* VBScript virus writers. - According to the C++ guys: us.
Circle Seven - The violent

- Perl programmers (if looks could kill). - Whoever was involved with crafting MSVC6's template support (this has sent many a C++ developer into a murderous frenzy).
Circle Eight - The Fraudulent

- Python pundits: a language with a global interpreter syncronization lock, that effectively serializes all object-based operations, is *not* truely multi-threaded.
Circle Nine - Traitors

That depends: - According to the .Net guys: Managed C++ programmers. - According to the Java guys: .Net programmers. - According to the Fortran guys: Fortran98 programmers. - According to the C++ guys: us. (I'm not sure where the Fark Photoshop contest winners go.) - EricAnderton at yahoo
Jan 06 2006
next sibling parent "Kris" <fu bar.com> writes:
deadlocked zombies in limbo ........ LOL!



"pragma" <pragma_member pathlink.com> wrote ...
 In article <dpmqhr$1snc$1 digitaldaemon.com>, Kris says...

Okay, I'll bite. Remember, its all in good fun. ;)
Circle One - Those in limbo

Those who fail to heed the rules of multithreaded programming, are doomed to deadlock for eternity.
Circle Two - The lustful

Asm programmers are simply in love with performance, and little else. ;)
Circle Three - The gluttonous

This one's full of web-developers for some reason - Java web applet programmers. - Php programmers - the API is so sprawling that it takes *two* web browsers to code with it. - Macromedia for making ColdFusion worse than it was... Lets take a not-quite-XML tag-based language (with embedded HTML, CSS and ECMA-script), with its own crippled ECMA-script-like language, run it through a Java-based compiler that emits side-effect prone Java code, to be compiled *again* into Java bytecode that then runs on a VM to serve a webpage, then reccomend that it be run on the crippled and crash-prone JRun webserver. Its resource cost can be calculated in Megawatt-hours per sacrificed chickens, just for a single developer workstation. (Not that I've used it or anything)
Circle Four - The hoarders

- Lisp programmers [are hogging all the parentheses]. - Anyone who doesn't close their file handles responsibly.
Circle Five - The wrathful

Virus writers.
Circle Six - The heretics

- VB Programmers *and* VBScript virus writers. - According to the C++ guys: us.
Circle Seven - The violent

- Perl programmers (if looks could kill). - Whoever was involved with crafting MSVC6's template support (this has sent many a C++ developer into a murderous frenzy).
Circle Eight - The Fraudulent

- Python pundits: a language with a global interpreter syncronization lock, that effectively serializes all object-based operations, is *not* truely multi-threaded.
Circle Nine - Traitors

That depends: - According to the .Net guys: Managed C++ programmers. - According to the Java guys: .Net programmers. - According to the Fortran guys: Fortran98 programmers. - According to the C++ guys: us. (I'm not sure where the Fark Photoshop contest winners go.) - EricAnderton at yahoo

Jan 06 2006
prev sibling parent "Charles" <noone nowhere.com> writes:
 - Macromedia for making ColdFusion worse than it was... Lets take a
 not-quite-XML tag-based language (with embedded HTML, CSS and

 its own crippled ECMA-script-like language, run it through a Java-based

 that emits side-effect prone Java code, to be compiled *again* into Java
 bytecode that then runs on a VM to serve a webpage, then reccomend that it

 run on the crippled and crash-prone JRun webserver.  Its resource cost can

 calculated in Megawatt-hours per sacrificed chickens, just for a single
 developer workstation. (Not that I've used it or anything)

LOL. So true. Sacrificial chickens always gets a laugh :D. "pragma" <pragma_member pathlink.com> wrote in message news:dpni0h$2glv$1 digitaldaemon.com...
 In article <dpmqhr$1snc$1 digitaldaemon.com>, Kris says...

Okay, I'll bite. Remember, its all in good fun. ;)
Circle One - Those in limbo

Those who fail to heed the rules of multithreaded programming, are doomed

 deadlock for eternity.

Circle Two - The lustful

Asm programmers are simply in love with performance, and little else. ;)
Circle Three - The gluttonous

This one's full of web-developers for some reason - Java web applet programmers. - Php programmers - the API is so sprawling that it takes *two* web

 code with it.
 - Macromedia for making ColdFusion worse than it was... Lets take a
 not-quite-XML tag-based language (with embedded HTML, CSS and

 its own crippled ECMA-script-like language, run it through a Java-based

 that emits side-effect prone Java code, to be compiled *again* into Java
 bytecode that then runs on a VM to serve a webpage, then reccomend that it

 run on the crippled and crash-prone JRun webserver.  Its resource cost can

 calculated in Megawatt-hours per sacrificed chickens, just for a single
 developer workstation. (Not that I've used it or anything)

Circle Four - The hoarders

- Lisp programmers [are hogging all the parentheses]. - Anyone who doesn't close their file handles responsibly.
Circle Five - The wrathful

Virus writers.
Circle Six - The heretics

- VB Programmers *and* VBScript virus writers. - According to the C++ guys: us.
Circle Seven - The violent

- Perl programmers (if looks could kill). - Whoever was involved with crafting MSVC6's template support (this has

 many a C++ developer into a murderous frenzy).

Circle Eight - The Fraudulent

- Python pundits: a language with a global interpreter syncronization

 effectively serializes all object-based operations, is *not* truely
 multi-threaded.

Circle Nine - Traitors

That depends: - According to the .Net guys: Managed C++ programmers. - According to the Java guys: .Net programmers. - According to the Fortran guys: Fortran98 programmers. - According to the C++ guys: us. (I'm not sure where the Fark Photoshop contest winners go.) - EricAnderton at yahoo

Jan 09 2006
prev sibling parent BCS <BCS_member pathlink.com> writes:
 Bowge IV. Sorcerers

whoever wrote these: http://www2.latech.edu/~acm/helloworld/multilang.html http://www.wizards.de/~frank/pi.ps http://www.tjhsst.edu/~edanaher/pslife/
Jan 07 2006
prev sibling parent "Walter Bright" <newshound digitalmars.com> writes:
 - EricAnderton at yahoo

Hi Eric, could you send me your email address, please?
Jan 12 2006